a woman after God's heart

Recently, I have been “meeting” topics related to death a lot. Today, there was a Facebook post that goes something like this - I need someone to stand up during my funeral and say “she didn’t even like y’all!”. That’s right! That got me thinking or maybe it was the higher being who posed this question to me, “who do you want to be at your funeral?” There were two images that I imagined. First, a group of people who were hypocrites; who appeared at my funeral so that they are in the good books; who did it out of obligation. They looked impatient yet stoic at the same time. Second image was a large group of friends who were in old clothes with old dirt stains, whom may smell a little but they looked like they have just lost someone dear to them, they looked sad. They made it to my funeral because I was their friend. Who do you want to be at your funeral? How then shall we live our lives?

The last time I changed job, I was still a junior executive. It wasn’t hard to adapt as I was still learning and received more grace from others as I was a newbie. The next time I change job, I would be a senior and seasoned executive... and I wonder how would be adaptation be. I look at my friends who swift jobs after 5-6 years in the previous organization, it must have cost them a lot of courage and humbling experience. I still feel that I am inadequiete and have nothing extraordinary to offer. Hmm. But I really need to get out from my comfort zone and live a “normal” life. Money isn’t everything and the chase will never end. Everyday now, I tell myself that this lifestyle will come to an end soon.. and I am looking forward.

I had a knee injury yesterday evening during a netball game. I was landing from a jump and felt my knee twisted for a spilt second. I could get up after a while. One of my experienced friend told me that it will be worse tomorrow. Well, she’s right! I woke up from the pain at 6.30am and I knew I will need longer time to prepare for my class, so it was good. I did everything so much slower than usual, and of course will the time allowance that I had, I was stress free although I was very very slow. On normal days, I would rush and walk super fast. I could catch the train that is a minute away. Today I could only catch a train that was 5 minutes away. Mannn... but beyond this slowness, I though to myself.. “maybe this injury is to slow me down, and allow me to calm down and enjoy the moment.” Most times, the bad things that we perceived can be a good thing or blessing from our loving Father. We just need to be aware of it.